Clarity 14

~Chapter 14~

Maya

Time really is flying when you’re having fun. Kute left a little while ago and I’m now alone with Richard in our living room, watching Pretty Woman. I don’t really mind being alone with him. It’s strange, but for some reason, I just trust him, which is strange because everybody knows I have trust issues.

Besides, I don’t really feel like this Richard I’m with is the same Richard Lim I’ve met during his photo shoot. Yes, the looks and everything is still intact but the screw of his character is completely loose. He kept telling me lines that never fail to make me laugh and then he’s always smirking and grinning. The Richard I knew doesn’t know how to smile or to say something funny. What happened?

So Sunshine is her name. I have the same question as Richard’s. Why am I suddenly interested in Sunshine? What got into me? But as Richard described her, I felt something inside of me. I don’t want to admit it but I do think that I’m jealous of her. I’m jealous because she has Richard with her that loves her after all of the heartaches she gave him. Simon should make Richard as his muse. Richard’s the man every girl would be glad to love.

“Ang pogi talaga ni Richard Gere eh.” I said as I turned my attention back to the movie. Richard Gere might be old but he still looks good, especially during this old movie. My gaze shifted to the clock beside our TV. It’s almost six in the evening. Why do I have this feeling that I’m forgetting something?

“Hindi Richard Lim?” I heard Richard tease.

Crap! I stared at Richard with a completely shocked face. He’s staring me back like he’s anticipating what I’m going to say. “Yung photo shoot bukas!” I exclaimed. “Hindi ko pa nako-confirm!” I quickly stood up but I lost my balance. I tried to regain my balance but then I realized, it’s too late, I’m going to fall on my side. I closed my eyes and just waited for the pain but it didn’t happen. I peeked and saw Richard standing in front of me and I took a look on what’s lying on my waist. It’s Richard’s hand.

“Careful.” I heard him mutter. I lifted my head and got stuck in his gaze – huge mistake. Our faces are so close to each other, making my heart flutter. His gaze made my insides tingle. I accidentally shifted my gaze to his lips – another huge mistake. Now, I want to feel his lips on mine.

The sound of our telephone ringing startled us both. We both backed off and his hand we’re gone in a second. That’s the case when something disturbed you eh? You suddenly realized the foolish things that happened and then the awkwardness comes along right away. Richard gave me a small smile and sat down on the couch again while I left to pick up the phone.

“H-Hello?” I stammered, still trying to recover to what just happened.

“Mayabels! Buti naman at sumagot ka na. Kanina pa kita tinatawagan sa phone mo, hindi ka nasagot! Hanyare?” Emman’s usual jolly voice welcomed my ears.

“Kasi – Basta Emman, mahabang istorya. Ikukwento ko sa’yo bukas ‘pag balik ko sa studio.” I said. I couldn’t really tell him about what happened between and Simon over the phone. There are just things you just have to tell in person.

I heard Emman sigh on the other line. “Sige, sige. Maghahanda ba ako ng popcorn o ng tissue?” He asked. It’s usually his joke whenever I have to tell something to him. Popcorn represents something fun, for his kilig and anything positive while the tissue is for the tears, for something negative.

“Uhm, pareho?” I said, more of a question.

“Dadamihan ko ang popcorn, kakalimutan natin ‘yang tissue na ‘yan.” Emman said making me smile. “O ano na, ang schedule bukas? Game ka ba?”

I bit my lower lip. I don’t know if I should accept it. Pros and cons? Pros – I can distract myself, I can earn money, I can do something I love, I can make people happy. Cons – I might encounter places that would remind me of him and .. that’s it. So my pros versus my cons .. “Sige, game ako.” I answered.

“Okay. Sure ‘yan ha. Ako na ‘yung kukuha nung sa prenup, pero pwede mo naman akong puntahan afterwards.” Emman said. I was about to reply when Richard appeared in front of me. He mouthed some words but I couldn’t read it. “Emman, teka lang.” I said over the phone. “Ano ‘yon?” I asked Richard.

“Yung pagkain dun sa mesa, nilagay ko na lang dun sa table sa harap ng TV para makakain ka na habang nanonood. Is that okay?” He asked. I glanced at our coffee table and the foods are already there.

“Sige. Thank you. Umuna ka nang kumain, susunod na ko.” I said and he left me again. I let out a deep breath. It’s all because of what happened earlier. I’m now starting to feel this awkwardness between us. “Hello Emman.” I said when I put the phone back on my ear.

“Sino ‘yun, si Kute?” He asked.

“Hinde. Si .. si Richard.” I admitted. “Nasa resto si Kute.”

“WHAAAAT? Kasama mo si Mr. Pogi? Eh teka teka, tumawag ako sa landline niyo, ibigsabihin, nasa bahay ka, tapos si Kute wala.” Emman said, analyzing the things I just said. And I know sooner or later he will start squealing. “AHHHHH! OMG Girl! Kasama ba to sa popcorn? Eh nasan si Simon? Wait! ‘Yun yung tissue?”

My mouth gaped. He got me spotted on. “Emman naman eh. Basta bukas na lang ako magkukwento ha.”

“Ay nako, girl, umiiwas sa kwento. Sige na sige na. If I know, mag-iispend lang kayo ng quality time ni Papa Richard. Pasabi ‘Hi’ ha?” He said then it was followed by his giggle. “Bye Mayabels! Enjoy your night with Mr. Lim!” Then he ended the call.

I hesitatingly went back to sit beside Richard on the couch. The movie is paused and when I finally sat down, he pressed the play button. “Is everything okay?” Richard asked. I nodded my head. “So you have work tomorrow? Why don’t you stay home muna?”

“Ayoko. Gusto kong magtrabaho. Eh kasi, tignan mo, kung dito lang ako sa bahay, anong gagawin ko? Magmumukmok? Kung magtatrabaho ako, madidistract ako sa mga iniisip ko.” I defended.

I thought Richard was going to disagree with me but he just nodded. “Point taken.” He said. “Ganyan din ako eh. I buried myself with work para pagdating ng gabi, tutulog na lang ako.”

“Richard, thank you ha.” I said.

“For what?”

“Kasi kung hindi ka pumunta, baka naiyak pa rin ako hanggang ngayon.” I said and he just nodded. “It must’ve been hard then. You know, moving on? But I think I’m lucky, kasi nandyan ka, at least natutulungan mo ko. Ikaw ba no’n, may tumulong din sa’yo?” I asked, prying for more information.

He sighed and shifted in his seat. “Yes, meron. James and her wife helped, even my father and my little brother. But I guess the pain I felt was just too great. Walang nangyari eh. Unlike you na nung pinuntahan kita, maayos ka na ngayon. In my case, months ata bago ako nahulasan.”

My face fell. “Richard, nakapagmove-on ka na ba?” I dared to ask.

His gaze shifted on me and I felt uneasy as I stared back in his eyes. “Honestly? Hindi pa.”

I turned my head back at him with my eyes wide. “Hindi pa? After two years, hindi pa?”

He shook his head with a small smile plastered on his face. “Nope. I’m still hoping I could win her back. Like the man in your dreams. You’re still holding unto him right?”

I slowly nodded. Yes, I’m still holding. For two years I’ve been waiting for him but until now, there’s no man that came. “Ayaw mo pang bumitaw?”

He shook his head as his answer. “How about you? Bibitaw ka na ba sa kanya?” He asked and I know that he’s talking about the man in my dreams.

“Sa ngayon? Oo. Parang gusto ko nang bumitaw. Ang tagal na nung two years, I don’t think I can wait any longer.” I said.

Richard’s mouth gaped. “Maya, you waited for two years, for two long years and you’re just going to throw it away? Sayang ‘yung paghihintay mo. If I were you, I would keep on waiting. Malay mo .. nandyan lang pala siya. Maybe, he’s on your shoot tomorrow. Maybe he’s outside the door, or you’ve already met him.” He said with sincerity, making me stare in his eyes. “Maybe you already talked to him. Or he could be anyone out there. Or maybe, he’s just near you, waiting for you, waiting for you to notice him, waiting for you to love him.”

I got lost in his eyes again. It’s like I’m trapped inside of it. What he was saying is different from what his eyes are telling me. His eyes are saying that there’s more to the words that came out from his mouth. But what is it?

The trance was broken again when his phone rang. Richard excused himself and went to the kitchen to answer his calls. I can hear that he’s talking about work. Way to go, Maya. You disturbed a busy man’s work and now his company is at stake.

I tucked my feet under and got lost for a moment. Is it really possible to love someone so much that you’re still willing to wait for him no matter how long you wait? In Richard’s case, it’s possible while I think it’s absurd. You could easily replace her, move on and fall in love all over again.

My eyes fell on the screen and it’s already near the ending. Vivian left Edward and now he needs to leave too but feels very different without Vivian, like a part of him is lost without her. Is that what Richard is feeling right now? No, no, I have to forget about his experience. Is that what I’m feeling right now, with the man in my dreams? That after all the things I’ve been through, do I still feel like there’s something missing in my life?

“The mind forgets but the heart remembers.”

I clutched my hand on my chest, near my heart. Definitely. There’s just something I’ve been longing to have near me and I know that it’s him. If my dreams came to life, I’m sure I’ll be the happiest woman that could ever live. Richard was right.

I can’t let go of him that easy.

Richard came back as the credits of the movie rolled in. I pressed the stop button and just settled for a channel on the cable. Then I handed a plate to him and we started eating. “Alam mo, gawain namin ‘to ni Kute, dito rin kami nakain madalas sa harapan ng TV.” I said. “Ayos lang sa’yo yung palabas?”

He nodded. “I don’t really mind. Hindi na ako nakakanood ng TV eh. Ang dami kasing trabaho.” He said. “Saan ‘yung shoot mo bukas?” He asked and I gave the address to him. “Wait, isn’t that like a park?”

I nodded. “5AM ang call time namin. Gagawin namin ‘yung ginawa dun sa ‘Yes Man’ na movie. ‘Yung pinagsabay nung character ni Zoey ‘yung jogging at photography class. Kaya required lahat ng kasali na magdala ng camera at syempre dapat ‘yung attire, fit para dun sa gagawin namin.” I explained.

“Is this a free admission thing or there’s registration with fee thing?” He asked again.

“Free admission siya. Ang gusto kasi nung manager nung park, magkaron ng dagdag advertisement ‘yung lugar kaya naghire siya ng katulad namin. Which is wise kasi bukod sa exercise, may makukuha pa silang photos from us.” I explained again.

We continued eating and exchanging information about work. We cleared the table after we ate and shortly after that, Kute arrived. Richard said that he has to go because he still has to go back to the firm to get his things. I walked him to his car.

“Richard, thank you ulit. Saka sorry sa abala.” I said.

A grin flew on his face. “You’re very welcome. And don’t you dare cry again, okay? Susugurin ko talaga ‘yung lalaking ‘yon.” He said, making me laugh.

“Promise, hindi na. Pipigilin ko na talaga. Ingat ka sa pagmamaneho.” I said and he got in his car but before he could shut the door, I called his name. “Richard!”

“Why?” He asked, sticking his head out.

“Tama ka, hindi ako bibitaw sa kanya.” I said. “I’ll wait just like the way you’re waiting for her. Pero sana man lang no, magparamdam siya. Kahit onti lang.”

He nodded with a smile. “Well that’s good to hear. Anyway, I’ll pick you up tomorrow. I’ll be here around four in the morning. Ihahatid na kita.”

“Ha? Eh nandito naman si Kute eh.” I said.

“I have a site visit tomorrow, around that area. Basta susunduin kita. No buts.” He said and shut the door of his car and started his engine. Before I could protest another word, he sped off. I walked back inside the house and head to my room to get my phone. I need to text him. The bouquet of sunflowers that he gave me was still on my bed so I took it with me and reached for my phone on the bed.

I disabled the blocking feature on my phone and saw the missed calls I received. There were ten. Two from Emman and eight from Richard. My phone beeped and it came from Richard.

No buts. I’ll be there tomorrow.

My eyes widened again. A smiley. Richard doesn’t send texts with smileys! I knew that for a fact from the times we exchanged a few texts. Who’s this Richard Lim I’m with now?

One thing’s for sure though.

I hope the man in my dreams would be someone like Richard.

 

..

thoughts?

A/N : Mawawala po muna ako ngayong weekend. Puro swimming po eh. I’ll be back by Monday, kapag po sinuwerte, Sunday night.Huntingin niyo na lang po ako sa Pansol. 😉 God bless po!